“The pains of b…

“The pains of building can be measured but the experience of success cannot be measured” Julius Afolabi



There are people that are signpost to where you are going to in life. signpost is a description of the details of a location. where is your destination. God always places human signpost at every junction of our life situations to help us reach victory. there are people who are mirrors to help you see how you look to be able to make the impression you were created for and called to fulfill. If the Ethiopian Eunuch never met Philip he would have remained ignorant about what he read all his life. don’t be educated and be frustrated. look up to God to open your eyes to see these human signposts. I pray that God show you these human signposts and grant your the exceeding grace to follow their instructions. If you are a child of God be careful of the wolf in sheep’s clothing ” how can you be a covenant child and have a carnal mentor”. you will not be a victim in JESUS NAME.

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This is a must read for every single desiring to say the three letter commitment “I DO”.

The three letter expression ” I DO” heralds and arouses great interest amongst many singles but little understanding has been paraded. This is responsible for the the rate of accidents beyond repairs in marriages and homes. Panel beating in a marriage is not a cheap feast, it is frankly a tough meat. Funny enough the calamities of these three letter are rarely a screen display before the reality of ” I DO”. The time spent mending the ignorant could have been invested in promoting the marriage.

Many people who ignorantly spilled these words have archives of stories and scars if they eventually wipe out the ignorance, however the tales of their delays in advancement premised by the attempts to amend and go to school again on their decision can be very good source of education before you say ” I DO”, There are quite a number of written books and unwritten but visible stories around you. Case Studies are simply stories that educate and question our thinking in line with the tragedies and triumph of others! “I DO” take a careful caution not a rush, saying it demands comprehensive thoughts since there are no awards for phonetics saying it. 

in the western world saying “I DO” is just like a gesture of hand shake which you can choose to keep your hands whenever but it always a bad tale when you say “I DO” and ” I WILL” and you eventually couldn’t. i believe it is an avoidable stigma hence this little counsel of mine. i think its appropriate you consider a few thoughts before you say “I DO”

Here is the observed phenomenon , when many singles want to get married they spend a lot of time and energy looking for the right person but only few singles devote time, energy & resources to be the right person!  “I DO” is a communication  and commitment that you can but can you? please understand that marriage is NOT a movie, there is no opportunity for rehearsal after you say “I DO” , the opportunity for rehearsal is now before you say “I DO”. 

Age is not the pre-requisite, are you ripe mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and physically? love is a state of mind, unsound people cannot practice and be in love. if you fall and fail in love, it is because you rejected the truth! hooking up with people of stretched age bracket requires a compatibility check, be careful! it is not the euphoria of the wedding but the happiness in the home!

Marriage is not a position, title or social strata portrait, IT IS A COMMITMENT! There is no order in getting married, it is only our preference that the elder should get married before the younger. position yourself with God and let him place you! Have you out grown fidelity compromise? fidelity compromise if unsettled and certified before you say “I DO” , welcome to misery in marriage. Why leave your home for the street when it is in your power to keep  it! True freedom is total abstinence! SEX as a promissory note before you say “I DO” have left many bankrupt! Do you want to apply?

many singles desire a five star husband yet we cant find a star in you, the question is what will be the basis of connection? Luck? you must be dreaming because luck is Laboring Under Correct Knowledge! men develop feelings by sight and woman develop feelings by hearing, discipline your eye and ears else they will manufacture dangerous feelings for you. the eyes and ears are firmly connected to the membranes of the mind which graduate the data captured into feelings then metamorphose into emotions and action. dont pamper your feelings else they ruin you!

Are you in the circle of friends and associates that are rightly eligible for “I DO”?Actions are seeds and life is fertile! Marriage is not a business for fools ONLY wise people profitably trade there! when your attitude gets funny, check your friends and associates and probably your ignorance!

How educated are you about the realities of life and handling them? Never ignore a reasonable story it may be your reason for living a good and life. Never trivialize the power of an article, it may contain bitter pills but they will save a bitter experience. 

Marriage is NOT a contest, no one get an awards for saying “I DO” before another, your award is your happiness in marriage and marital bliss! How do you look? appearance can be deceptive, is yours so? your morphology can be a bait, dont let it victimize you, it is the frame work of your mind that counts not your physical structure. All that will be adjusted after “I DO” so adjust your mind now to preserve your structure.

Finally, words when spoken are VERY difficult to retrieve (ask Edo State  governor) before you say “I DO” . examine yourself, Am i marriageable? can i marry a person like me? Am i the right person for him or her? Does the truth of God’s word certify me for “I DO”. 

Before you say ” I DO”. it is profitable that you consider who you have become! i wish you marital bliss and the true experience of love as you say “I DO”.

Remain true to yourself.


Follow on twitter: @juliusafolabi



 An interesting conversation ensued in my mind and i had no option than to share it with you believing it will catapult your reasoning!

Memory said i am of yester-years but imagination is saying i am years to come! I interjected “why sit in the past when the future is waiting for the activities of the present! Just as you cannot test the depth of the ocean with your legs so we cannot determine the power of our mind! your mind is rich you are only poor with its extraction. God is not a man but man is a similitude of God! Why do people want to revisit their past, i guess they suddenly realized they were too poor with their mind! Truly, it is foolishness to refer to a better past when your age didn’t depreciate! Are you investing in your memory to improve your imagination or ruining your imagination with your memory? i think it is better to build a treasury than rot in the archive! what are you going to do with your MIND? May you not disappoint your deposits! i Just ended a conversation with your mind! Good luck to your imagination! the world is waiting for the harvest! Don’t waste in obsolescence! Question your mind! Welcome to innovation! However….

Truly the past is a coffin but imagination is reality yet pursued! imagination gave birth to recycling as a way to give life to the past but there question of performance was left with effort! without effort no conversion is possible. can we recycle the past? yes and How? Simple Change the thought patterns that reigned in the past and take decisive action in the present to wipe away the ferocity of the reputation injury, let the wound heal even though the scar would leave. this is the miracle, if the imagination is etched indelibly it will make faint the scar of the past! you can move from penury to wealth, you can move from failure to success and you can move from death to life. all is possible by grace while you are still living and willing to make a difference. funny enough you dye your hair but you cant dye your bones. old age don’t hide likewise youthfulness wont hide, the latter is precursor of the future (imagination) while the former is the beneficiary of the memory. 

Innovation is a revival and that is possible for the living. if any man be in Christ, He is a new creature, old things are past away and behold all things have become new (2 Cor 5: 17). Renew your past by beating the imagination of the devil into salvation. your memory may be corrupt , your imagination can be remolded! your past may have been terrible with salvation you move from history to the glory of victory!

What an interesting conversation!